Energy Vampires! What Are They & How Can We Protect Ourselves?

How to protect yourself from energy vampires

How to protect yourself from energy vampires

 

When people hear the word vampire, they think of Mary Shelly and her wild and haunting stories. There’s gore and darkness and a lot of really bad make-up! 

Truth be told, real vampires don’t go around drinking blood directly out of the spout, they sit across the table from you, look deep into your eyes, and drain the life out of you. Ehem, I mean, they draw energy from your vibration, potentially depleting your emotional and spiritual gold.

These sad folks are sometimes called “Emotional Vampires” or Narcissists. Make no mistake about it, attempting to have reciprocal relationships with these people can take a toll on your life, especially if you are unaware of the dynamics at play. 

 

You probably already know a Vampire.

According to Judith Orloff M.D., a practicing Psychologist in L.A., “… the biggest energy drain on my patients is relationships. Some relationships are positive and mood-elevating. Others can suck optimism and serenity right out of you.” 

Humans are social creatures. We love to hug, gather, and chit-chat. With the hope of another person filling our little gaps, we open ourselves up upon every chance at intimacy. We work together in large groups, meet for dinner and drinks, and immerse ourselves in complex family constructs. In the midst of it all, each of us is most certainly engaging or nurturing a vampire. Energy vampires can even be a spouse.

Has anybody you know repeatedly failed to deliver on promises? 

Have they made excuses and guilted you into doing their work for them? 

Maybe they only want to spend time with you when it’s convenient for them? 

In your moment of need, do they disappear?

When connecting with you, are they obsessed with their own needs and challenges? 

Is it all drama, all day, every day?

All of these folks might be feeding off of your goodwill and kindness. They might be draining you of energy better spent on yourself. After cleaning up after them, driving them places, making excuses for them, putting up with their diversions, and trying not to crack under their pressure, you might need a month of detox!

These relationships are toxic for sure – and if not properly managed, they could feed off you to the point of absolute devastation. 

Be careful, set boundaries, don’t take on their karma, and continually check-in with yourself to make sure you’re not giving up energy that you don’t have.

Be On The Lookout For These Things

Specifics change from vampire to vampire, but they all have a few key characteristics. 

Energy vampires and narcissists:

  •   Tend to be very charismatic and engaging 
  •   Continually draw attention to themselves
  •   Lack empathy 
  •   Lack an understanding reciprocity, balance, and being “other-focused”
  •   Appear extremely needy and lazy
  •   Talk a good game but rarely act
  •   Find it difficult to change their behavior 
  •   Manipulate others to do everything for them
  •   Rarely own their bad behavior – except when we threaten to leave them

Getting other people to do all the work is easier when you’re a smooth talker. It also helps when you’re able to project confidence and enthusiasm. Energy vampires might boast that they are extroverts, but they’re most often desperate at a core level.  

Some of them spend an unusual amount of time focused on their own appearance. They might have the perfect excuses for how they spend their time and money on things that are obviously not prudent, mature, or good for them. They might say that their recreational drugs help them sleep or feel less anxious. 

Everything a vampire does is about filling the sad, bottomless holes within them.

One of my former narcissist, celebrity clients could not help but make a villain out of everybody in her life, including her husband, sisters, nanny, chef – you name it. She had no sense of who she was because she continually devoured the people in her life. She could not understand how every person in her life had value. She made each of them out to be a villain. 

Additionally, she could barely own, declare, and defend her opinions, which changed like the wind, let alone her challenges, shortcomings, and massive, misguided ego. It was sad to watch. 

My ideas for this sad soul were all about being more productive, fulfilling her agreements, renegotiating her relationships, and improving the structure in her personal and professional lives. Yet, all of these ideas became thorns for her. She simply could not fathom the idea of hard work, especially when it came to working on herself. Everything was EVERYBODY else’s fault. 

This is classic narcissism. This type of person does not want real relationships in her life, she wants every person in her life to validate her every whim, glance, thought, and incongruence. She would grimace at the thought of having to reflect upon herself. She found it exhausting. 

While many of these vampires are outgoing, silver-tongued, and maybe even sexy, some spend time in the background, appearing unassuming and quiet. This is only part of their engagement patterns. They’ll perch and await the right moment to play the victim card. When they do, look out! This is when all hell breaks loose. 

As they shout and freak out about all of their assumptions, projections, stress, and delusions, they find culprits for every aspect of their self-created pain. They NEVER look in the mirror and say, “I chose these experiences. How can I honor them and then improve upon myself?” This concept would never dawn on a narcissist. 

They’ll always find an excuse or response along the lines of “You might have it slightly bad in your life at times, but I have it way worse. Here are 10 contrived examples born from my self-aggrandized ego.”

These fascinating embodiments of Eternal Black Holes will complain about money, health, their car, or a broken fingernail – anything to refocus attention back on them. If the conversation is aimed at anything other than their vanity, their overactive minds will be hard at work looking for the bridge that takes the conversation back to them. 

If you’re speaking, chances are they are not listening. Their primary focus at that point is to mentally perseverate on what they could say next so that the attention returns to them.  

The Energy Vampires in your life may appear to be completely unique, with their own styles and attitudes. They might appear to be different on the surface, but don’t be fooled. Make no mistake about it, all Energy Vampires will eventually seek to slowly chip away at your happiness, well-being, and life-force. They can’t help themselves. 

 

3 Ways to Protect yourself from Vampires

Unfortunately, garlic and wooden stakes are not very effective against vampires and other types of narcissists. In most situations, these pathetic users and abusers are parents, children, friends, spouses, or coworkers. If they’re too entrenched in your life, it can be almost impossible to remove them or set clear boundaries with them. That said, if you’re careful, thoughtful, and consistent about it, you can learn to coexist with and sometimes completely eradicate vampires. 

 

1. Remove The Vampires From Your Life

If you are constantly burdened with the drama of another person, it can cause unnecessary stress, and affect everything from sleep to health. You’ve continually tried to serve them, sometimes with the grace and patience of a living saint. You’ve felt stressed, burdened, angry, sad, and sometimes completely drained of energy. 

You’ve stayed on the phone with them for hours listening to their complaints. You’ve given everything you can and they still ask for more. In these cases, you have no choice but to release them from your life. 

The key here is to remember that these people tend to be unaware of the pain they’ve caused you. Even if you’ve told them time and time again, chances are they will be unable to hear you. They simply cannot listen to feedback. 

Even when you say goodbye, their responses will be something like, “Why are you doing this to me?” Or “I can’t believe you don’t care about me!” When you don’t answer their texts and calls, they send you guilt-ridden messages that make them sound like you shot them in the head and stole their legs.  

It’s time to say buh-bye. You don’t have to create a major in-person event to get this done. All you have to do is calmly tell them how busy you are, and then slowly exit the relationship. Think of it as titrating off of drugs. You are a drug to them. To help them withdraw, you need to show some tough love – most importantly tough love for yourself. Say goodbye and move on.

The good news is that most of these people will immediately find another person to engage and manipulate. They’ll start texting these new punching bags late at night and eventually hook one of them. At that point, you’re 100% off the hook and clear of their toxic debris! 

GOOD ON YA, MATE! Stay positive and keep moving forward! And never let them back into your life.

 

2. Manage The Time You Spend With Narcissists

Coworkers, family members, and old friends can be tricky to remove, and it might be far more work to remove them than simply manage your time with them. By setting schedules with them, ones that serve your happiness, you can improve your energy levels and emotional stress. 

Because Energy and Emotional vampires often lack empathy, you’ll need to be clear, direct, and consistent. Subtle hints are usually deflected, ignored, or seen as thin, permeable, and changeable boundaries. 

If you’re hankerin’ for less time with your narcissist or vampire, here are a few things you can say to them:

  •   I’m working on an all-consuming project, back to you in a few weeks. Sorry.
  •   I’m needing some time along, you know me, always moving too fast. Need some me-time. Thanks for understanding. 
  •   Doc just told me if I don’t stop texting at night, I’ll never relax enough to actually sleep. 
  •   I need some space because I’m exhausted and need to revamp my priorities. 
  •   My husband/wife needs more time with me and I will need to be texting and calling less with all sorts of folks in my life – it’s time to prioritize – thanks for hearing me out

If you’re in a family full of vampires, you might need to build a chore wheel and map out a schedule for meal time, alone time, and other times that allow you to make space for yourself and inquire within. 

By trying some of these things, you will feel more energetic, aware, and relaxed. You’ll also begin to imagine other ways that you can improve your life. Stay focused and shake off any guilt that comes your way. Your primary relationships are to yourself and the Universe. Everyone else can get over themselves and adjust.

 

3. Set Boundaries With Vampires & Narcissists

When forced into close proximity with vampires and narcissists, it’s vital to recognize the extent to which you are depleting yourself. It’s not about them – it’s about you. If you’re constantly exhausted after exchanges with them, it’s time to buck-up and set some adult boundaries. YOU CAN DO THIS!

With coworkers, you’ll need to be politically correct, clear, and kind. You don’t want to jeopardize your work-sitch, especially if you love your job. Tell this category of vampires that you are falling behind in your deliverables and you need to get yourself together so that you are able to sustain your life. 

For the vampire friends and family members in your life, stay away from giving them advice. They don’t want to hear it. Own your stuff and tell them how much you care about them – but don’t be a panting puppy dog. Just be clear and concise. If you’re deeply empathic, be very careful to block their projections and do not absorb any of their disappointment, sadness, or anger. That’s their stuff. You focus on your stuff. 

You must remember that when you develop a true sense-of-self and you protect this Self by setting boundaries, you’re educating the vampires in your life and all of the people who engage with them. 

By removing yourself from these dynamics, you stop a variety of codependent cycles. 

 

Energy Vampires Are Here to Stay

Throughout our lives, we will run into countless people that want to take advantage of your kindness. While there are many ways to cope with the people using you, it can be downright impossible to remove all of them. And you could spend a thousand lifetimes trying to fix them.

Modern day technology has spoiled many people. Companies cater to customers and build a false sense of entitlement in many, because of this, Energy Vampires thrive on others catering their every want and need. Remember that behind each email address, each phone call, and each smile, is a whole person with emotions and needs just like yours.

 

 

What if YOU are the Vampire in the Relationship?

If you’re reading this and feel like, “Holy moly, I’m a vampire!,” then my gosh, lucky you! Use this article as a pathway to improve yourself. There is no time like the present moment to own your shit and start improving your life. Go for it!

Some vampires and narcissists are completely clueless. It’s not because they’re bad people, it’s because hey grew up needy and nobody ever challenged their self-absorbed self-concept. If we change things within ourselves, we become stronger, studier, more compassionate, and more clear. 

Remember this: whatever your narrative is, whatever is ailing you, whatever you feel overwhelmed with and consumed by, other people are going through the same thing – or worse. 

Remember, too, change doesn’t happen overnight. Over time, the little changes you make will result in a big impact on you, your energy, and the people around you. Start small. Before picking up the phone to blame someone or manipulate someone into helping you, write down a few things you can do to improve your situation. When we look within, we find ALL the answers. 

Most importantly, when building relationships with others, allow the other person to speak, and remember to LISTEN! It can be tempting to think about how you are going to respond, but this is just plain lazy. Listening deeply to others, we expand our hearts and our understanding of the Universe. 

When listening, consider how it might feel to be in their situation, then respond honestly and lovingly. If you’re tired of your inner-narcissist, seek to serve others. This is the quickest pathway to our liberation.

Meditate, journal, and pray. When you pray for others, the Universe prays for you. You are unlimited in every direction, so refrain from making excuses – and get to work! When you unfold and expand, you become a light to others. Every thought, intention, and action feeds the eternal whole. Be a light and you will become the light. 

 

 

 

Highly Sensitive People (HSP): The Gifts, Challenges, And Miracles Of Being Super-Sensitive Super-Heroes

Highly Sensitive People (HSP) are Super-Sensitive Superheroes

Highly Sensitive People (HSP) are Super-Sensitive Superheroes

Each of us is a unique, living Being, filled with a unique set of insights, experiences, attitudes, attributes, and skills. Additionally, each of us projects unique temporary self-identities into the world, each with a unique level of sensitivity. 

Some of us are super-empathic, while others can hear through walls. The most sensitive of us have a variety of super-hero-like qualities, which can be a blessing or a curse. If you can fly high, you can also fall hard.

If you’re super-sensitive and can feel someone’s pain or reality in some way, you might be a Highly Sensitive Person or HSP. HSPs do not have a debilitating disorder, rather, they have an expanded awareness through one or more of their senses. 

The bigshots in the psychology world call this “sensory-processing sensitivity” or “extra-sensory perception.” I call it LUCKY! Being highly sensitive invites a wide range of awareness and great depths of experiences. As an HSP or Empath, you’ll never wonder if “this is all there is” in life, because you’ll always be ingesting or experiencing something super-sad, harsh, beautiful, luscious, troubling, traumatic, deepening, expanding, or wildly fascinating. 

I always say that HSPs and Empaths are People In Technicolor! It’s like Crayola gave us a larger variety of crayons to play with. Enjoy them all!

People with these types of traits feel and experience themselves to be more connected to the world around them. While life can be a little challenging for those of us who feel or sense everything everywhere, we each have the ability to clear the air, release the energy, and begin again HSPs and Empaths are NEVER victims. 

You can learn more about being the best HSPs or Empaths you can be by reading my EMPATH OATH. Go for it!

 

The 12 Gifts Of Highly Sensitive People

 

1. Expanded, Vibrant Senses

Most HSPs have heightened senses. Their experiences of smell, taste, hearing, touch, emotion, and sight are extraordinary, often superior when compared to the rest of us. This can be a blessing when we work in fields that require specific sense-acuity, but might make it difficult to function or appear to function normally in regular-Joe, everyday, suburban life. 

One thing is certain: being an HSP or Empath will invite feelings and understandings that the rest of the population will only read about. 

With heightened senses, we are better able to understand others. We can feel through to the depth of what someone is feeling or embodying. HSPs can sense things in other people that they might never be able to articulate. 

Being super-sensitive can also be a little challenging at times. Smells can trigger discomfort, gagging, dizziness, or headaches. Taste can either accentuate a flavor you love or one that makes you feel kinda yucky. 

Sounds can be healing and enlightening, but sometimes make us feel unsettled or too anxious to sleep at night. 

Bright lights can trigger physical healings and supernatural awareness, while for some HSPs, they might temporarily experience migraines or slight confusion. 

For some of the most sensitive HSPs and Empaths, clothes can affect how they feel or produce unsightly rashes at times, which can have impacts on positivity, clarity, productivity, intimacy, and communication. 

People with stronger senses often find it difficult to enjoy crowded social environments like restaurants and bars. These over-stimulating environments might take a toll on them and are best to be avoided. 

Some HSP super-heroes can even find it challenging to be around those who wear perfumes, essential oils, and cologne. Some flowers in the wild might also trigger temporary discomfort. And yet, sometimes these smells can open pathways and doorways to awareness and knowledge only found in the other realms. 

Heck, if you’re invested in being super-sensitive and you practice meditation, forgiveness, yoga, and similar, you might experience merging with the divine on occasion and have a fast path to enlightenment. Just be careful to stay out of your ego with regard to this aspect. 

Suffice to say, being an HSP or Empath is certainly fascinating! 

 

 2. Enhanced Audio Responses

Highly Sensitive People have stronger responses to ASMR. The gentle sounds of scraping ears or whispering can cause a sensitive person to get goosebumps and tingles. They often enjoy playing static sounds while they work or sleep to a sound machine. This “white noise” can be incredibly nurturing and calming for HSPs.

Background noise helps HSPs block and ignore the other sounds that interrupt their concentration, clarity, or sleep. This may not be a problem at home, but hotels, social gatherings, and hanging with friends at their homes can result in feeling sad, overwhelmed, drained, and more. After exposure to these environments, you might also be unable to sleep for a time.

When listening to music, sensitive people feel the depths of the artists’ intentions. They may laugh or dance wildly, unable to contain themselves. Or they may burst into tears from the music, and have no explanation. 

Our hearing can provoke a rush of emotions within us and give rise to bursts of energy. In the right setting, these abilities can enhance a person’s life, while at other times, interfere with their joy and flow.

 

3. Difficulty in Crowds

With heightened senses, it’s no surprise that HSPs prefers to not be surrounded by too many things at once. In malls, around large crowds, and socializing with strangers, sensitive people can find it difficult to focus and communicate. 

Empaths and HSPs can’t help but absorb the energies of everything that’s happening around them. In a busy food court, HSPs are surrounded by conversations they can’t turn off. In extreme cases, they may be forced to put on headphones or sit far away from others. These might be the only remedies to help them feel relaxed, present, and peaceful. 

These highly sensitive souls will most likely hear, understand, and feel empathy for concurrent conversations within their surrounding areas. If asked, they could solve everybody’s problems with 10 words or less. 

Seriously, being an HSP is both incredible and overwhelming at the same time. Being friends with an HSP can be wonderfully illuminating or a little challenging now and again. 

 

4. High Levels of Empathy

HSPs often report feeling more connected to others at an early age. Their fascination with their heightened senses allows them to embody the people they meet. They feel emotions that are beyond their present inner depths. Because of this, they often develop acute understandings of the human condition.

Highly Sensitive People are empathetic and use their natural gifts to solve problems. Because of this, most find it easy to help others, quickly finding solutions to problems other people find challenging. 

The connection an HSP shares with the world allows them to better understand how things are connected. In the right hands, these abilities can shape the lives of those around them.

 

  5. Frequent Crying

The wonderful world of being highly sensitive can be like a roller coaster at The International Emotions Theme Park. Empaths and HSPs can fall in love and hate within one sneeze. Some of these folks may find it difficult to separate themselves from others – especially after slightly or exaggerated intimate exchanges. 

Dr. Elaine Aaron reports, sensitive people tend to cry more than non-HSPs. This is because they often place themselves in the situations of others. For them, witnessing loss in other people is equal to experiencing those losses first hand. Because of this, sad events and dramatic movies can be both expanding and challenging for the HSP.

If you love to cry, you might be an Empath or HSP. Awesome! The more we feel and cry-out the realities of others, the more we expand and improve upon ourselves. If we can feel into and forgive every aspect in creation, we forgive the same within ourselves – and we expand more regularly into the light. 

 

6. Difficulty Observing Graphic Content

HSPs experience can sense sorrow and sadness a mile away. If a priest is hearing confession three blocks down the road, an Empath might feel the confessioner’s heart. It’s that intense! The same can be said for how they can sense, feel, and absorb fear and other types of pain. 

This means it can be challenging to watch horror movies, action flicks, and any content that appears to be graphic or violent in some way. Heck, even a sex scene can make an HSP nervous, anxious, or depressed. 

In extreme cases, these lovely sensitive, and often overwhelmed people, might report feeling the pain of those afflicted. Others may feel queasy or scared when consuming cringy content.  

 

 7. Struggling Under Pressure

An HSP may be quick to feel overwhelmed, confused, or frozen. Growing up, they may have tended to buckle under pressures of tests, often performing worse than they expected. Their school and work projects may cause them to fail in their homework and deliverables, while experiencing a serious lack of sleep.

As they mature and grow, a Highly Sensitive Person might discover they have personal issues when there are too many challenges at work and too many confusing dynamics at home. 

As such, an HSP can become acutely aware of every missing or challenged aspect in their lives, the composite of which can cause them to spiral out of control, into elation, or into exhaustion. 

When working with or loving an HSP, one might never be able to predict the day-to-day or longer-term trajectories and outcomes!

 

8. Creative and Innovative

Growing up, sensitive people report having had more imaginary friends, needing and enjoying role-playing games, and having the urge to be continuously self-expressive and creative. Their creativity blossoms when focused on drawings, reading, exploring new ideas, and innovating on something mundane or lifeless. 

As adults, HSPs are often very ingenious, tending to uncover new ways that the world and its inhabitants can improve their realities. HSPs often report having vivid dreams and wandering within their minds, into newly imagined realities. 

HSPs and Empaths might also find it easier to consciously leave their bodies, seeking to explore this realm and spacetime continuum, and others. 

 

9. Caffeine Sensitivity

For many sensitive people, morning coffee is either an awesome drug, debilitating virus, or simply out of the question. Just a small cup of coffee can send HSPs into a becoming a would, shaking mess. They might enjoy that for 10 minutes, and then they’ll be on the floor sobbing into their socks. 

HSPs and Empaths should try to avoid most caffeine and sugar – all because of the crash. Their crashes are 2-10X more elaborate and dramatic than everybody else’s. 

Espresso can be better for Empaths because it helps their minds focus. Espresso is also a more feminine and creative experience, whereas coffee usually creates an aggressive state of mind and heart.   

Substance sensitivity doesn’t stop there. Many HSPs report increased effects of alcohol, candy, and meat. Some choose to remove these things from their diet entirely. The finely tuned body of an HSP might have no use for stimulants or depressants. The slightest nudge in either direction will disrupt their balance.

If you’re an HSP, you might consider exploring Ayurvedic medicine, where it’s all about balancing your doshas (or aspects). Your body might require the finely-tuned experience of this ancient modality, the extent of which could help you regain lost energy, set energetic boundaries, and maintain a healthy emotional balance within yourself, for years to come. 

 

10. Fight Well with Others

Fights and disagreements with close friends or family can prove devastating for those who are deeply attuned to the people around them. An HSP will also carry the emotions and experiences of those they love for a long period of time, often hurting themselves. 

For those who are super-connected, every conflict can lead to sets of visceral reactions. As a fight or disagreement ensues around them, they may even become ill or nauseous.

Because of their deep Empathic natures, they tend to avoid drama and conflict, saving themselves the stress of feeling a loved-one’s pain, anguish, sadness, anger, and frustration.

 

11. Attuned to Their Surroundings

HSPs find it easier to stay focused when working or living in spaces committed to support their current hobbies, tasks, and endeavors. When the energy of the room matches theirs, they might be able to relax a little more. If an environment is dedicated to chaos or play, Empaths can find it it difficult to function, relate with others, or be productive. While open offices can be challenging for an HSP, when working within a secure and quiet space, they will tend to thrive. 

Modern society favors extroverts and busy environments to keep workflow at maximum speed. Sensitive individuals may find they work best when there are no distractions whatsoever. 

 

12. Often Exhausted

People who are naturally more connected to their emotions and the energies around them might report feeling burned-out out over-extended. Somehow they are unable to turn off their gifts and enjoy their own, private space. 

When HSPs are subject to feeling everything around them, they absorb every person’s problems and take them on as their private, subtle-body projections. If they’re not careful and forget to release the energies they’ve absorbed, they will feel drained and exhausted. 

Some of the energies that HSPs consume will feel as though they are abusing themselves. This is a common dilemma among HSPs and Empaths. 

Highly Sensitive People often have to take breaks from society, families, and complex work environments. They continually need the time and space where they can experience peacefulness, clarity, and relaxation. 

HSPs may find meditation and yoga (link) will help them silence the world around them. Others might go camping or detach from society altogether. 

Regardless of their choice, HSP’s eventually become overburdened with the world around them and may remove themselves to recharge their emotional batteries, and clear their minds. 

 

Highly Sensitive People Moving Forward

If you’re an HSP, GOD BLESS YOU! It can be challenging, but my gosh, it can also be incredibly illuminating!

As you grow older, you might learn to expand upon your sensitivities and become a coach, psychic, intuitive reader, or therapist. You might choose to help others in these ways or use your sensitivities to expand your soul and life. 

As an HSP, you’ve been given a 5th sense. This will allow you to experience the world in four or five dimensions, while others are subject to three dimensions.

Whatever your gifts are, whether simple and common, or outrageous and other-worldly, seek to serve others so that you can expand your nature and improve humanities experience while here on the lovely and beautiful planet Earth.

How to Grow a Healing Garden at Home

Growing a healing herb garden at home
Growing a healing herb garden at home
A Shutterstock Licensed Image.

Whether you cook at home, create your own incense, or look to nature to solve most of your problems, there is one fact you can’t deny: when it comes to plants, fresher is always better. 

For many of us, it can be difficult to find unusual and healing herbs in grocery stores or within new-age supply chains. Luckily, the internet has made growing your own garden at home easier than ever.

Hook it up! Let’s grow a garden! Wooohooo!

 

Finding the Right Location

Once you’ve decided to build your magic garden, the first thing you need to do is choose the location. Do you want to plant outside or inside? How about both! Each of these locations has benefits and drawbacks that affect growth and the ability to keep plants safe, healthy, and productive.

Regardless of location, plants, like all things, live best in balance with the elements. This includes plenty of sunlight to promote new growth, water for nourishment and to remain upright, soil to draw nutrients from, and carbon dioxide to produce energy. When you are choosing where you want to set up your garden, keep the elements in mind!

 

Indoors

Depending on where you live, the only place you can grow plants might be inside. There are plenty of planters available that not only allow adequate drainage but double as beautiful centerpieces in any room.

Place the planter near a window or skylight. Most plants require 4-10 hours of light, but the type of light can differ.

Bright Light

Use southern/western facing windows, or north/east if you live in the southern hemisphere. Bright light means direct light. If you look at the sky from the height of the leaves, you should see the sun. If you don’t have a window with direct light, you might have to add a synthetic source. Luckily, LEDs have made growing lamps cheaper, and they won’t jack up your electric bill.

Indirect Light

Use northern/eastern facing windows, opposite for the southern hemisphere. If you want the garden in a room with direct light, move the garden further away from the window or find another way to restrict light. You can use sheer curtains or add tint to windows to help control the amount of light plants will receive.

Low Light

Most houses have low levels of light. A good rule to follow is to try and read a book. If you keep thinking you want to turn a light on, the room has low light. Move plants away from windows or choose to plant in front of a northern window, southern for south of the equator.

 

Outdoors

When planting outdoors, it is a lot easier to judge how much light the garden will get. Shade is indirect light. If the area is in shade most of the day, it is a location with low light. 

Wild, untempered animals and humans should be kept out of garden beds and directed away from areas where they might step on plants and prevent new growth. If you have kids, dogs, ferrets, dragons, or large, careless humans in your tribe, you might consider installing a fence to manage them all. This will keep your garden safe and productive.

Remember, any changes to the perimeter could alter how the sun hits the plants. Consider opting for wireframe fences or barriers made from material that lets light through – a trellis for instance.

 

Before You Plant

Now that you’ve selected the ideal location to start your garden, you’re ready to till the soil and add a fertilizing agent.

There are many commercially available fertilizers out there, but keeping it to old fashion manure is the cheapest and safest way to add nutrients to the soil. The purpose of fertilization is to add nitrates to the growth medium. Over time, soil can become infertile, sapped of all its nutrients, and barely usable. By adding fertilizer, you can be sure that the plant foliage will have everything it needs to grow bountifully. This is especially true if you are growing vegetables and fruits in the same garden.

Once you have fertilized the soil, spread it or pour it out evenly. If you are adding fertilizer after laying your soul, till the ground to mix everything together. It’s important to make sure your dirt is packed tightly enough to support the weight of the plant, but not so tight so as to restrict the growth patterns of root systems and the flow of chi. 

After the earth is prepared and the ideal location has been selected, it’s time for the best part, selecting the plants for your new super awesome garden.

 

Picking your Plants

Being the root of all medicine, each plant has some medicinal property or another. There are many encyclopedias that aim to list every plant and their properties. These are just a few of the easiest to come by,

 

Aloe Vera

Light — Full, Part Sun

Soil —   Sandy

Bloom — Summer

Folknames— Medicine Plant, Burn Plant, Saqal, Zabila

Uses —

Aloe Vera is thought to protect the people and locations that are in contact with it. Planting it outside can ward off unwanted energy. In some parts of Africa and Mexico, cuttings are hung on doors to prevent evil spirits from entering.

It’s no secret that aloe is used to heal burns, which is good because this plant thrives in tropical environments. If you have naturally sandy soil and live in a coastal region, chances are there is already some of this plant living near to you. Aloe is a hardy plant that is forgiving to even the newest gardener.

 

Gotu-Kola

Light — Full, Part Sun

Soil —   Moist

Folknames— Indian Pennywort, Hydrocotyle

Uses —

Popular in meditation, Gotu-Kola is dried and burnt prior to meditation to help users relax and deepen their attention. Although the plant is known to love water, be careful not to drown the roots. Add enough water to moisten the soil, but don’t allow puddles to form. Indoors, be sure the plant has plenty of space to drain.

 

Mint

Light — Full Sun

Soil —   Loamy (Sand, Silt, and a little Clay)

Folknames — Garden Mint

Uses —

Mint is celebrated for its ability to heal. Used in teas or topically as salves, mint has been used for centuries to alleviate headaches, upset stomachs, and many other aches and pains. When growing, you can’t ask for an easier plant. Mint grows in direct sun and spreads rapidly. As an added bonus, the scent will help keep away mosquitos.

 

Chives

Light — Full Sun

Soil —   Loamy to Sandy

Bloom — Summer

Flower Color — Pink, Purple, Red, White

Folknames— Rush Leek

Uses —

Can be used fresh or dried in cooking or teas. Green onions have been used in traditional Chinese medicine for thousands of years. The herb is thought to increase fertility in men and heal those that come in contact with it. Some cultures believe the strong scent scares away evil spirits. When added to the garden, green onions can attract butterflies and other wonderful Light-Beings!

 

Basil

Light — Full Sun

Soil —   Loamy

Bloom — Summer

Flower Color — Pink, Purple, White

Folknames— American Dittany, St. Joseph’s Wort, Njilika

Uses —

Love, wealth, protection, and controlling emotions. The scent of fresh basil is thought to ignite empathy. Through understanding, this magical herb helps build relationships and brings love into the lives of those it touches. Some users also report improvements in depression.

 

Thyme

Light — Full, Part Sun

Soil —   Loamy, Sandy

Uses —

Thyme has several uses. Its smell provides courage and energy to those who wear it. The herb is burned to promote good health and speedy recoveries. Like Sage, Thyme can also be used to smudge areas you are trying to cleanse.

 

Hot Peppers

Light — Full, Part Sun

Soil —   Loamy

Bloom — Summer

Flower Color —White

Uses —

Peppers are actually fruit; as such, they require more nutrients than other plants on this list. The plant itself is very hardy, but the pepper will grow proportionally to the quality of the care that is afforded them. Peppers are used throughout the world to treat pain. The chemical that makes them spicy helps boost metabolism and decreases inflammation.

These are just a few of the easiest plants to grow if you are starting a garden for the first time. There is an almost unlimited list of plants to choose from, but the benefits reaped from tending the garden can be just as beneficial as the plants themselves.

When we take time to care for others, including plants, we begin to understand our connection to the world around us. For many, gardening is a kind of meditation, a moment of peace away from distractions. Whether it be for cooking, spiritual growth, or healing, growing plants can help improve your life. 

When gardening or tilling your soil, communicate with all the elements. Tell your seeds, plants, soil, and microbes that you love them. Sing to them. Tell them how grateful you are that they are alive and in the process of nurturing and nourishing you and your family. 

You are a Light-Being and so are all the plants and minerals in your garden. You are one big happy family. Love each other and enjoy each other. Remember that you are the leader of this massive tribe. Share your love often!

The Nature Of Spirits: What Are They And How Do They Function?

Spirits are everywhere in the world around us

Spirits are everywhere in the world around us

 

SPIRITS ARE EVERYWHERE! YAY!

Maybe you’ve been visited by a spirit from another realm. It might be that you feel there is an entity attaching to you somehow. Or maybe you’re just curious as to the nature of spirits: what they do, why they appear, where do they reside, and how can they be in both the spirit world and this physical reality?

The veils between here and there are thin. While our lives might appear to be one solid experience with clearly defined forms and boundaries, the truth is far more complex and bizarre.

As we relate with people in our daily lives, we must remember that they comprise a tiny subset of a much larger group of relationships with whom we relate on a regular basis.

When we awake in the morning, we might feel as though we are alone. We might even love our solitude. The reality is that we are never 100% alone. There are always spirits wandering about. They might not be sitting on our beds as we sip our morning java, but you can be certain that some are hovering or meandering somewhere near your home.

Spirits are everywhere. They come and go within this realm and on this planet, and throughout many others. Spacetime is not limited in any way. And neither are spirits.

Spirits Pop In And Out

Like you and me, each spirit has its own electromagnetic signature and vibration. This means it will magnetize aspects of itself – to itself – just like you and I would attract situations, relationships, and learning in our physical lives here on planet earth.

Whether they know it or not, spirits can dematerialize and reappear at will. They might not even know when they are appearing and disappearing. Their electromagnetic signatures have a life of their own.

Most spirits aren’t fully conscious of their skills or the nature of their form. Most often, they behave like children playing Hide-n-Go-Seek or lost puppies who lost track of how to get home.

We are each a collection of particles continuously moving from one reality to another. It’s the same with spirits and it’s the same with every physical object in our lives – the chair, the computer, the couch. Everything is moving within itself and outside itself without any limiting boundaries. The only limiting boundaries are form, assumption, intention, and vibration – all of which are changeable.

And now the super complex part….

What Is Infused In A Spirit’s Vibration?

While you, me, and any spirit might appear to be a very specific thing, there’s a lot going on under the hood. It might look like an old fucked-up truck, but it may have been built in a way to make you think it’s got no teeth. It might appear to be a GMC Pacer or Toyota Prius in the picture, but once you get a look at the engine,  you’ll know the nature of the beast.

Each of us has lived thousands of lives. We live, we get excited, we do stuff, then we die. At the moment of our death, we imagine where we are headed, and since we don’t usually clean our palettes at death, we don’t die very well. We leave our bodies, feel confused, get a sense that we have some unfinished business and juicy desires, choose another mom or dad, then, within 6 months of Earth-time, we end up birthing into a similar form doing similar things.

YAY! REINCARNATION! WOOHOOO!

No thanks.

The idea here would be to meditate, pray, have boundaries, learn lessons, and inch toward the simultaneous death of our egos and bodies. Since our egos carry the agendas, if we diminish them over time (reducing our vasanas,  desires, etc), we can die and exit our bodies and truly complete.

If we don’t achieve enlightenment in this lifetime, through a great deal of effort, we can certainly achieve a higher level of consciousness. That said, if we’re not careful while we are dying and exiting this body, we could easily trick ourselves (or be tricked) into doing all the same crap all over again.

Yeah, let’s not do that.

When we are born, built into our fabrics, deeply infused into our natures, is the unfinished business of prior lives. Ahh! There’s the rub! Yes. We are not necessarily what we appear to be. This is why when you date someone and it feels all warm-fuzzy and then all of a sudden, it’s holy-moly, this person is NUTZO, it’s because they are working through their stuff – just like you – which is why you attracted them in the first place.

There you are all pretty and wonderful, but you know that something else is going on. You have anger, struggles, concerns, confusion, and more. You might be continuously attracting knuckleheads into your life and losing limbs at every turn. You might be happy on one particular day and then feeling like death on another.

This is all because we have unresolved desires (vasanas), each of which takes quite a bit of effort to dissolve. Each vasana has been with us for many lifetimes. We might dissolve one and then grow another – until we stop growing desires and refuse them all. That’s called LIBERATION.

We might not even know the half of what we’re carrying in terms of karma and vasanas. Our cute little lives might not be able to handle all of them. We birth, have vasanas, and work through as much as possible. What mostly happens though is that we enter this life excited and we continue to be excited about all of it, including the vasanas. We tend to forget that we were mostly in pain during our life. We forget that the pain can be avoided by releasing the vasanas. Therein lies the challenge: we love the emotional roller coasters of karma. We love to own and achieve, even though neither what we own or what we achieve can be carried forward from life to life. Yup, we’re not that bright.

This is why I highly recommend having spiritual masters and gurus in this life. They can help us expedite the burning of karma and vasanas.  As a devotee of Amma (Amma.com), The Hugging Saint, I am continuously uplifted. In many ways, I feel Amma has my back. If not Amma, there’s Jesus, Yogananda, Mother Meera, or a host of other loving, enlightened Beings who are either living or recently lived here on Earth.

Keep reading, but enjoy this other article I wrote about what happens when we die. JUICY!

How Do We Burn Through Karma

The more we pray, the more we love, the more we meditate, the more we can release the negative aspects of ourselves, including the twisty, tenacious twirls of karma. We can also do rituals, pujas, and ceremonies that help us forgive ourselves, forgive others, and dissolve the attachments and burdens that inhibit us. It’s all about forgiveness. It’s all about letting go.

Remember, this is all an illusion.

I subscribe to and pay Amma’s temple to do pujas for each aspect of my soul and life. Meanwhile, I do rituals that I’ve learned from Native American and other teachers. These rituals are powerful. They’ll change your life. I also pray, chant mantras, chant sutras, and do lots of giveaways. All of these things help me enrich my soul and connect with higher vibrations.

Why Is This Spirit Following Me?

This is one my favorite questions.

One of the more probable answers is that the spirit is someone you knew from this life or a prior life. This spirit might feel unresolved about prior life interactions with you or they’ve come to tell you they love you. This might even just want to hang out with you. Why? They might be bored or they might need to watch you for a while so they can learn something specific from you.

The spirit might also be someone who wants to know you, but hasn’t met you within a physical life experience yet.

And yes, some spirits just want to cuddle. I know that sounds a bit scary, but it’s really no big deal. It’s like when a puppy nuzzles up to you. Just relax and ask them to follow the light and go elsewhere.

While some people like me tend to sensationalize this idea of detached spirits and all the dangers – that’s so rare, it’s not even worth mentioning. They are as open boundaries and a nudge to leave as all the positive and peaceful spirits. They just might need a little more love for a moment. You can also just chant your mantra or a sutra and hold the intention that they find the light.

From a spiritual-lesson perspective, here’s another answer: If you attracted it, it’s you! You are the Universe. You are everything! No matter what is in front of you or within you, you must deal with it as if it were an aspect of YOU. Because it is. You are what you seek. You are what you see. You are what you attract. You are what you project. You are what you experience. Own it all, forgive it all, and release it all. In truth, it’s all nothing.

When we have negative energies and spirits attaching to us, it’s a really GOOD SIGN. It’s a wake-up call. Just like in real life when a crazy person tries to hurt you in some way, it’s God saying, “Hey, you might want to look at this part of yourself.”

I see spirits all time time. Some of them scare the heck out of me. Others are so sweet that I can barely handle it. Here’s the thing – all of these spirits are the same. They are a little lost and they need love. For each spirit who engages me, I might scream at first LOL, but then I immediately tell them I love them. I say things like:

“You are so beautiful and so loved. I am with you and I want you to be happy. God loves you. The light is waiting for you. Follow the light, follow your heart, and seek your highest Self. You are love, my dear. Go toward love and become it! Follow that light and you’ll feel better. I LOVE YOU!”

 

If you attracted them, they are either interested in your Lightbody or they recognize their shadows as being the same ones within you. It doesn’t really matter why or how they appeared. What matters is that you love them and you want them to be happy. Doing so, you might also see and feel things within yourself that require forgiving.

Look at every aspect of yourself and your life and forgive it all. Go piece by piece, person by person, circumstance by circumstance, and forgive everything about everything, forever backward and forward.

 

Dissolving it all, we can Be Here Now.

Loving it all, We Can Be Without Fear.

 

Fear is good because it reminds us of the unprotected parts of our lives. We can then improve those parts. Soon, most fears can become little friends who continue to remind us to protect ourselves.

Fear can also be a nasty sore. The idea here would be to look honestly at your fears and look for ways to either uplevel them into love or dissolve them into history.

The Past Does Not Exist. It Is A Canceled Check. Let It Go.

 

After doing rituals and forgiving, it’s important that we get back to the present moment. That’s because we only have the present moment. Everything else is a result of our minds and spirits seeking attachments and control.

All we can do is love.

If we know how to love, we can serve others.

If we have fear, we can meditate on love.

If we have spirits attaching to us, we can meditate on love, and we can pray for those spirits. When we pray for others, the Universe prays for us. We can also pray for ourselves. My gosh, pray for yourself as often as possible! PRAYER WORKS!

If something is bothering you or if someone is attacking you, you can set boundaries. You are powerful. We are resourceful. You are a Light-Being wrapped in light and love, born from stardust.

I already know that I love you, even if you have blocks and even if I don’t see you perfectly as you believe yourself to be. I know that I want to love you. I know that love works. It can dissolve all burdens.

Jesus was love. Jesus is love.

Buddha is nothingness wrapped in love.

You are the same. You are all of it.

 

Remember yourself. Remember how lovely and wonderful you are.

Be love. You got this!

When Love Is Difficult To Find

We are always looking for experiences outside ourselves. We use these experiences to help us decide whether or not to be happy in any given moment. We continuously seek relationships, with the hope that each one will give us a missing part of ourselves. We buy cars, take trips, cut our hair, and work out. We run from place to place, hoping for at least one moment on this day, we will have a moment of unfettered joy. We might not even care about the joy at this point in our lives. We might simply be yearning for flashes of feeling free. 

Why are these moments of feeling joy and freedom so rare? Why does love and freedom escape us? Why can’t we find love and freedom – right now, right here? What is wrong with me?

First of all, there is nothing wrong with you. Love is the most difficult action we can take in this world. The problem is that we believe love to be a feeling. It’s not. Love is an action. Some of us believe love to involve romance. It doesn’t. There is nothing loving about romance. Romance is a projection that does not involve the other person. It involves what you are projecting onto the other person. It also requires that the other person give you something very specific. When this specific gift is no longer available, neither is the romance. Love is not romance. Romance is not love.

Romance involves neediness, demands, projection, desire, enabling, and passive aggression. Love is simply an action whereby we choose to serve and honor another person. Love is not demanding, needy, or hurtful. And while it’s never complicated, we often complicate it. Instead of looking for love within ourselves, we expect to only experience love from others. We might become so unreasonable that we’ll shame the other person into becoming the exact image of our unreasonable and unconscious idea of love. 

We prefer to objectify our lovers, manipulating them into servitude, rather than educating them by becoming an example of love. As we imprison others, we become imprisoned. 

So, where is all the love that’s available to me? 

Love is only available from source. You are connected to source. Once you become love, you’ll basque in it, which in turn will reflect onto the other people in your life. They still might not meet your secret expectations, but those expectations will pale in comparison to your embodiment of love. As you live in love, you’ll want to serve others – and all the details will fade away. You’ll obsess less, project less, and demand less. You’ll live in the moment more and more, and you’ll be satisfied. When you seek love from within, you achieve a durable, lasting love. It’s a river of love that continues to give – if you allow it. No matter who comes and goes in your life, this love can never be taken away from you. 

Some people believe that God is love. I believe that God is love. I believe that the whole Universe, and all the realms and Universes throughout our ever-expanding creation are one Being, all born from love. We were love long before our physical birth in this life. Some of us might bring former life memories and attitudes into this life, and potentially corrupt it. We might learn bad habits in this life and disconnect from love. Regardless, we can always return to our birthright – LOVE. It’s a choice in every moment of every day. 

What Does It Mean When We Say “No Excuses”?

Throughout our lives, we see many people succeed and many who fail. We might workshop those who reach the tops of mountains, and we might dismiss those who suffer defeat. As we wander the planet pursuing our passions and interests, we might secretly worship one of the world’s “winners” in our mind’s eye, hoping that one day we’ll achieve a status equal to theirs. Amid our own victories and failures, we learn what works and what doesn’t. We either improve, pivot, or die. If we’re honest with ourselves, we might admit that we rarely learn from our mistakes. Because we might be a little stubborn or addicted to behaviors and beliefs, we might never free ourselves from bad habits and misconceptions. It all comes down to our excuses. 

The idea of “no excuses” is simple. You either want to grow and improve your conditions, or you do not. You might want to expand your horizons or keep everything the way it is. If you want to truly change and advance your position in the world, it won’t be easy. It will not only require self-sacrifice and hard work, it will require you moving beyond your temporary self-identity and ego, and into a state of humility, honest, and wonder. If you’re too enthused with your identity and ego, you’ll continue to defend the notion that excuses are real. They are not. 

An excuse is a statement that we use to justify our inability to find pathways to improved conditions. It’s often contrived out of thin air and presented within ourselves in such a way that it brings us shame and lowers our electric vibration. When we have 4 or 5 excuses, we believe we have a legal, defensible case against ourselves and our potential. We then use our minds to take ourselves to spiritual court. Even with the best intentions and most innovative slights of hand, we’ll lose this battle every time. We are too smart for our own good. 

Here are a few reasons why your excuses are contrived fantasies that you’re using to defeat yourself and defend laziness:

1: You have skin, bones, a brain, a heart, and passion. With these elements, you can accomplish nearly anything. What most often happens is that we get distracted and depressed, and we refuse to shift our behaviors toward a more enlightening feeling or position. When you add our addictions to social media to the mix, you have a stew that can only breed mediocrity and complaints. 

2: Your ideas and passions are not that complicated. It’s not like your goal is to fly to a distant nebula on a magical, nuclear, cocktail napkin. Your desires are most likely based in reality, which gives you a fighting chance at bringing them to life. 

3: You have already tried sitting around, complaining, and building a case against yourself.

4: You already know which of the people in your life you no longer value. You’ve been keeping them around so you can feel validated. Its within this codependent model that we grow mental and emotional infections that can prevent us from ever evolving. 

5: You have made mistakes and you have created some unique, winning scenarios. Even with a predominance of failures, you still have enough data to thrust you forward with confidence. 

6: You’re sick of your attitude, so why not try something else?

Whether you believe in reincarnation or not, this life of yours is happening. It’s ON. It’s moving forward with or without you. Why not get over yourself, admit you’re blocked, and choose to change your daily routine so you can advance your life to the next level? Whether you’re in a wheelchair, convalescent home, army barracks, or depressing job, I would guess that all of your excuses are fabrications to justify your incorrect beliefs about yourself. 

Change your beliefs and you change your life. Go get em!

How To Set Boundaries And Sometimes Say Goodbye

 

We’ve all been there – stuck in a relationship with someone who drives us nuts or seeks to harm us. We don’t know how to free ourselves from the chains and bondage. We can’t seem to fathom a life without them, even though they impede our happiness. It’s a serious problem in the world today. With family constructs built upon foundations based on guilt and codependency, we all find it difficult to push back, draw the line, and break ties. But, haven’t you had enough? Aren’t you ready to reconstruct how to think about and enact these things? Do you want a change?

For those of us with big hearts and never-ending pools of energy, setting boundaries can be difficult. We might be in the midst of experiencing something deeply inspiring and truly wonderful, yet somehow we’ll allow an old flame, sibling, or arch-nemesis to mess us up. It’s an old story: “Life was going along so well – until ding-dong came along and hurt me again!” 

It doesn’t have to be this way. 

 

 

How To Set Boundaries With Confidence

1: When the other person is not around, write down how you feel now that you are separate from them. Continue to imagine other scenarios where they are not around and note how you feel. 

2: Make a list of the people who enable this relationship to continue. You know who I’m talking about: the tangential people who appear to be invested in you and the other person being connected. Write down their names and what you believe they continue to receive from you having this relationship.

3: Make a list of how your life would change if this harmful person was no longer in your life.

4: Make a list of the types of people you would prefer to have in your life. You can also list their attributes. 

5: Write an email, letter, or text to the person with whom you want to set boundaries. Share a clear list with them, nothing what the boundaries are, and what life will be like with these new boundaries in place. Ask that they respect your request. If the person is dangerous, send a copy of the communication to your lawyer and best friend. Send the communication and move on. If they have follow-up questions, that’s okay, but set a 24-hour time limit, then hold firm and move on.

6: Write and send emails, letters or texts and tell these people about the new boundaries you’ve set up. Ask them to either support you in this endeavor or remain detached and out of your way. 

7: Remain clear, firm, and positive. Stick to your plan. Release anyone from your life who is not supportive of this pursuit. They don’t deserve you and they might find other ways to trip-you-up in the future. 

Remember: Setting boundaries is about protecting yourself. It is not about offending the other person. While the other person might want to feel offended, it is their illusion to relish or release.

How To Say Goodbye To Someone (maybe forever)

1: Be very clear about how you feel about this person. Make sure that your decision to remove them from your life has come after a long series of events or over many years. 

2: Forget whether or not they deserve one more chance. They probably don’t. 

  1. Write an email, letter, or text to this person outlining (as briefly as possible) why you need to move on without them. In your communication, share what you learned and what you still have not learned. If you can sincerely say “thank you” for something they gave you, do that with an open heart. Don’t gush, just state something positive. Send the communication and move on. If they have follow-up questions, that’s okay, but set a 72-hour time limit, then silence. 
  2. Notify the people whom you both know in common. Ask that they respect your decision. If you need to cite a few reasons, that’s okay. Just don’t vomit all over the page when communicating with these people. Keep it simple and move on.

5: Honor how you feel, release our emotions, and pray for everyone involved. 

It’s difficult to make drastic changes to the relationships in our lives. As we get older, we realize that having 20 friends can be exhausting, but having 1, 2, or 3 best friends can be energizing and freeing. It’s all about freeing yourself so that you can attract and choose positive experiences that bring you clarity, joy, love, and happiness. You can do this. Be clear, honor your feelings, and move on. It’s time.

Is Anger Your Enemy Or Your Friend?

The human mind is so complex, it’s a wonder that we can feel anything at all. When an event occurs in our life, it doesn’t pass through us, it lingers, sometimes for decades. When we experience challenges, we spend more time obsessing over how bad we feel, rather than creating a plan and acting upon that plan. When our relationships change, we carry the related emotional fodder for far too long. For some reason, we’re not adept at having an experience, freeing ourselves, and then moving on. The same can be said for our lingering feelings of anger.

First of all, it’s 100% okay to feel anger, even celebrate it. You might want to throw a party for your anger or use it to fuel the birth of a new business. Anger can be extremely inspiring, provoking, and transformative. It’s like carrying a forest fire in your pants. 

If you’re feeling anger, it’s your friend. If, because of your anger, you’re acting outrageously or putting others in danger, the anger is truly your enemy. Keep in mind that your anger didn’t ask to become the enemy. It just came up. Like a bubble in a can of soda, it emerged as real, moved upward, and then rested at the top for a moment. What you might not realize is that anger has an expiry date – if you permit it. 

If anger is bubbling up inside of you, see it as bubbles of nothingness. Consider this: The anger was born from a prior experience, and provoked into existence. Since the event that angered you is longer happening, why hold onto the emotion that stemmed from it? Even positive emotions can restrict us and enslave us to the past.

Your anger was useful for a time. It helped you make some decisions. It assisted you in the evolution of your ability to discern. Your anger was an ally – until it began interrupting your experiences around happiness, connectedness, and love. 

If your anger is still causing you to disconnect from your goodness and heart, you’re giving it too much power. You might need to venture into the woods and pound the earth for a time. You might need to do a ritual or religious ceremony where you call upon your higher Being to heal and help you. You might simply need to find the tears beneath your anger so that you can soften your heart and reconnect with all the goodness around you. 

Don’t let your anger manage you. Don’t allow it to maneuver you into being someone you are not. Don’t invest in it or plan to use it for too long. Let your anger have its day – and then set yourself free from it. You’ll be happier and more successful if focus on the positive aspects in your life. Doing so, your anger will naturally dismiss itself from your field of view. 

Remember to be grateful. You are alive on a planet filled with beautiful trees, flowers, rivers, lakes, and creatures. You have enough health to be able to function in this world and experience some of its joys. You can communicate with other living Beings. You most likely have a place to life and have food in your fridge. You were also born with an unlimited capacity to think, feel, and experience. You are a miracle. Never forget that. 

If you have yet to forgive someone or own your part in a series of difficult events, it might be time to forgive yourself and everyone involved. This will put your anger in service to your evolution.

The Sacred Nature Of Our Emotions: How Ritual And Release Inch Us Toward Awakening

The Sacred Nature of Our Emotions Through Ritual and Release
The Sacred Nature of Our Emotions Through Ritual and Release
Expand your Self by understanding your emotions. A Shutterstock Licensed Image.

 

Emotions Are Little Bundles Of Energy 

 

In order to truly appreciate and understand our relationships with emotions, we must first understand electromagnetism. 

 

As electrically charged particles interact, they create an electromagnetic force. Particles attract to form bundles or matter, thereby emitting energy. These forces are then transported, giving birth to light and other electromagnetic radiation.

 

Atoms come together because of this magnetic pull, weaving together to form our physical realities. 

 

To put it simply, we would not and could not exist without electromagnetism

 

When applied to emotions, we find that our thoughts forge these tiny energy-Beings. We experience an emotion when a charged thought enters our mind. This can be something positive, like feeling happy while thinking about a close friend we saw last week, or more towards the negative end of the spectrum, such as the shame we feel when remembering an embarrassing moment. Ya know, that time you suggested peanut butter during foreplay. 

 

Positive emotions (i.e. joy, peace, relaxation, etc.) elevate our lives and relationships, and can boost your immune systems. In short, positive emotions can help keep you healthy. 

 

Negative emotions, on the other hand, will drain you of focus, energy, light, and health. Hate, blame, denial, anxiety, depression, and fear are just a few of the less desirable emotions that you may experience over your lifetime. 

 

Just remember, everything is temporary, well, except your expansive and unlimited nature!

 

It doesn’t take much energy to create emotions. With every experience we have, emotions are birthed, absorbed, and used to form responses with the help of our personalities. Ongoing, our emotions are effortlessly filtered through our individual combinations of perceptions, beliefs, and prior knowledge to result in either dissolved, tabled, repressed, or fully expressed emotions. 

 

Emotional responses are invoked easily as our ideas and thoughts bounce through our minds, hearts, and bodies. These free-flowing processes result in ultra-compacted and powerful (potentially volatile) raw energy. 

 

The energy of your emotions is so strong that it not only affects your own life but can even affect those around you. If you’re a  super-hero or -villain, your emotions could set a barn on fire.

 

While each emotion contributes its own energy and frequency patterns, they all come together to form one collective Being. Every emotion you experience has the power to heal, fuel your reality, or create destruction. They emit their own electromagnetic discharges as they continue to move around and live within you. 

 

The energy emitted can and will impact your overall vibrational frequency. Positive emotions like love and peace have similarly positive vibrations while negative emotions like hate and fear vibrate at a lower frequency.

 

Over time, this compounding of emotions can shape your personality and reality. 

 

If you hold on to grudges, suffer from anxiety, or tend to obsess over prior traumas, you can’t release anything. Chances are you’ve already experienced the consequences in the form of fatigue, foggy brain function, or the seemingly ubiquitous bad luck you claim to have. 

 

If you fill your life with more positive emotions like forgiveness, acceptance, gratitude, and joy, you might find that your experiences are quite the opposite. The stats point to feeling healthier, more active, and luckier – and you’ll probably enjoy a sprinkle (or waterfall) of positive, happy accidents.

 

Don’t underestimate the power of emotions

 

If all else fails, BE GRATEFUL! Your gratitude will emit one powerful bundle of energy! 

 

As we emote and react to external stimuli, we release electromagnetic discharges and chemicals that others can pick up on. I’m sure you’ve experienced this even if you didn’t realize it at the time. 

 

Think back to a time when you were in a movie theater and felt the buzz of excitement at the film’s climax. Or the hushed, weighty silence of worry and concern that falls when a professional sports player gets hurt mid-play. What about the infectious laughter of a baby? 

 

Emotions are powerful, and as such, they should be treated with respect. 

 

Are you forced to endure them, unable to change your trajectory because of past events?

NO!

 

While it can be difficult to control our emotions, especially in cases of high stress or trauma, we can still take steps to improve, if not choose, them. 

 

“Amma’s happiness is when you
find bliss within yourselves.”

— Amma

 

How Can I Change My Emotions For The Better? 

 

The good news is that your nature, soul, and body are all made up of energy – just like our emotions. This means that our vibrations and intentions rule our realities, giving us the power to make improvements based on intentional action

 

After all, each of us is composed of light and sound. 

 

Here are just a few of the ways you can move, dissolve, improve, integrate, or awaken electromagnetic discharges and emotions so that they continue to work more in your favor: 

 

  • Stop judging your emotions. Let yourself feel them, even when it hurts. Try to love your emotions as little friends showing up to teach you something. Your emotions are your roommates! LOVE THEM!
  • Allow yourself to safely express negative emotions in order to minimize their internal effects on you. If the negative feelings persist, even after venting, take up a preferred modality like journaling, completing a healing ritual, or going for a walk. It’s also okay to punch the earth and scream – or throw a pretty lamp against the wall (as long as you don’t hurt anybody, including yourself!)
  • Be your authentic Self—open yourself to a pure encounter with your core self – your nature – your divinely inspired spirit
  • When a feeling is positive, share it with those around you, and let it fill you your heart. This will expand your vibration and provide healing light for your entire Being.
  • Take note of how much energy an emotion takes to sustain when you realize its presence.
  • Choose the higher perspectives in every situation and you’ll find that your emotions will follow your lead. Never dismiss negative emotions without first accepting and understanding them. It’s also important to keep control and not let any emotion influence your present relating and decisions.
  • Meditate, pray, forgive others, forgive yourself, and participate in rituals intended to uplevel your vibrations (Check out these FREE resources that provide an extensive starting point for encouragement and self-improvement!)

 

Is Negative Energy Something To Fear? 

book-live-intuitive-reading-with-paul-wagner

The short answer is meh, not really. Actually, no. While there are spirits in this world that do need to be exorcised, the likelihood of being hurt by that kind of energy is so unlikely that it’s almost impossible. 

 

If you feel oppressed by negative energy it’s probably emanating from you, not someone or something else. This realization should be taken with optimism because that means you’re in control. You can take control of your actions and monitor your responses. 

 

Take active steps to alleviate symptoms of bad energy. A walk in the woods or a park stroll, daily meditation, and incorporating essential oils into your regime are all great ways to reduce stress and raise your vibration. Consider praying for your enemies as well. 

 

If the negative energy isn’t going to cause you physical harm, should you feel bad for purging it from your space? Absolutely not! 

 

If a spirit or energy is making you uncomfortable, you are allowed to clear the blockages. 

 

There are a lot of ways to remove negative energy: burning sage, engaging the spirit with love and positive intentions, praying, and completing cleansing rituals, to name a few. 

 

I regularly have spirits visit me or wander near to me. I tell them I love them and I ask that they follow their own light or the light that leads to eternity. I encourage them to feel whole and love the divine. 

 

If you have a friendly or cranky ghost gracing your existence, befriend them and then encourage them to wander elsewhere. You might also check the rituals on my Free Resources page – on PaulWagner.com to learn more about this. 

 

Love Yourself Through Meditation 

 

A common theme you’ll find throughout these articles and across the teachings of most masters & gurus is the importance of meditation and prayer. Oh, and gratitude. Are you grateful today?!

 

The ability for meditation & prayer to improve our lives is something that has been evaluated for years and continues to impress scientists to this day. Skeptics continue to question the benefits, but studies still show the medical benefits of meditation. I mean, my heavens, when the TM movement headed to Washington DC to meditate for a while, there was an insanely drastic drop in crime. 

 

Meditation works. It aligns you with your nature, releases toxins, sets you up for a peaceful few hours, and sends positive vibes throughout creation. Meditate and your peace & positivity will land on distant shores and within far-away souls.

 

One Harvard study found that participants who meditated over time showed an increase in gray matter within the prefrontal cortex, helping with executive decision making. Conversely, areas of the brain corresponding to fear and stress become smaller over time. Improvement was seen in other areas of the brain as well, including cognition, emotional regulation, empathy, learning, and production of regulatory neurotransmitters.

 

Despite the evidence of success, a lot of people won’t start meditating because they believe they don’t have the time. But you don’t have to dedicate hours at a time when you first start. 

 

Start by meditating 2 minutes a day. That’s it. When you feel comfortable, start adding more time each day. By easing into it, you’ll create a long-term habit that will provide you clarity of mind. 

 

You can also use mantras to help detach from your overactive mind and increase focus on the highest of vibrations.  

 

If the idea of meditation and mantras still sounds too difficult to overcome, try mindfulness. 

 

Mindfulness, at its most basic of definitions, can be boiled down to paying attention to your ongoing experiences and choosing peacefulness in relation to every thought, action, person, response, and feeling.

 

You don’t have to be perfect to reach mindfulness. Even if you feel broken or disconnected from your heart, you can create a connection to clarity and stay aware of your effect on others

 

You might only be able to reach mindfulness for a few moments at a time when you begin, but that’s still progress! 

 

Healing And Releasing Relationships 

 

What can you do to improve your relationships with the people in your intimate, immediate, or distant circles? If emotions and energy are contagious, you can bet that improving your energy, mindset, and clarity will immediately improve your relationships with everybody you’re connected with – including yourself. 

 

Sometimes a relationship can be improved or uplifted by something as simple as opening a conversation. If you’re picking up on negative energy because of a miscommunication, the two (or more) of you can try sharing your feelings with each other – but without any blame. If we share in a way that inspires the other person’s compassion or empathy, we’ve created a pathway to healing. 

 

Unfortunately, there are also times where the toxic person in your life takes things a step too far. It may hurt to have to release them. You might even feel a deep loss for a while. Truth be told, you will ultimately feel better when you surround yourself with authentic individuals who do not seek to oppress, control, invalidate, or guilt you. When your circle of friends is vibrant and full of light, you will be, too!

 

If someone does you wrong, forgive them! As a matter of fact, forgive the fuck out of EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE! The emotions that result from forgiveness will yield wisdom. Wisdom informs our actions. 

 

Forgiveness allows us to release imagery and emotions that otherwise restrict us.

 

Overall, we are bursts of sound and light – all energy – all infused with the divine’s imprint. Everything around us and everything in the universe is made of energy. 

 

Like attracts like, so if you’re emitting higher vibrations, you’ll attract high vibrations!

 

Remember to take care of your health on every level – physical, emotional, and spiritual. Try Kundalini Meditation, deep breathing exercises, or essential oils to boost overall health. Did I mention Gratitude and Forgiveness? Oh yeah, I did. Good! Do that!

 

If you’re interested in more information on prayers, rituals, mantras, or even encouragement, you can check out my free resources page. 

 

Remember that you are the embodiment of light and love. Live according to your highest potential!