Energy Vampires! How to Spot, Repel, & Avoid Them
We’ve all met these types of people. They are either sad, broken, emotionally dramatic, or simply narcissistic. Somehow they refuse to own their stuff and seek to improve themselves. While these people deserve our love and compassion, they do not necessarily deserve our attention or time.
Are you feeling continuously drained at work, home, or social events? Do you often feel stressed so you cannot enjoy the things you once loved? Are you feeling unmotivated and unable to engage in life?
These symptoms may be surfacing for several reasons:
An introverted personality strained by constant social interaction
Depression born from repressed emotions
Confusion due to various life stressors and changes
Are you ready to take back your life and cast out all that bad energy?
It’s time to learn which people in your life are sucking the happiness right out of you and preventing you from enjoying the activities you once enjoyed!
What is an Energy Vampire?
At first, the term “Energy Vampire” seems fantastical, but it’s becoming a common term used to label several types of personalities. Simply put, Energy Vampires are people who feed on your energy and who selfishly use that energy solely for themselves, kind of like new-age narcissists.
That definition makes it seem like these people are dark, twisted villains who are looking for vulnerable people to prey upon, but that’s not often the case. Most of the time, Energy Vampires don’t realize how challenging they are or how their toxic personality traits affect the people around them.
Certain personalities lend themselves to evolving into Energy Vampires due to learned behavior. It’s possible that Mom or Dad was an Energy Vampire and nurtured their child into an equally dramatic and needy personality. Or maybe the Vamp in your life had a difficult childhood and now craves attention from anyone that will lend an ear. Unable to give to others reciprocally, they become accustomed to unstable and imbalanced relationships.
Like many other behaviors, Energy-Vampirism is often representative of an unconscious lifestyle that can go undetected by the person exhibiting it for a lifetime.
The Energy Vampire Spectrum
Spotting an Energy Vampire might be difficult, especially if these folks are close to you. It can be hard to see relatives, friends, and coworkers with an objective point of view. Further, Energy Vampires can emerge within a broad spectrum of a variety of personalities and behaviors.
At the very least, Energy Vampires are often narcissistic. They assume that the world revolves around them and that everyone exists to serve them in some way. Emotionally or psychologically entrenched in their desires and problems, they cannot consider other peoples’ needs and feelings. Every time you encounter them, you might be unable to get a word in to express your thoughts and feelings.
In the middle of the spectrum, these narcissistic Vamps become manipulative. They actively use you to get what they want, whether it’s constant attention, validation, an exalted ego, or worse. These people demonstrate little concern for how their ongoing needs affect you. Whether they’re conscious of it or not, they take advantage of everyone around them.
On the extreme end, these types of vampires are psychopathic. Their social behavior is often exaggerated or intense due to innate aggression or ongoing mood instability. This type of person is draining because you’re either constantly giving to them, tensely on guard, or nervously uncertain about what they’ll do next. In many ways, you might be bracing yourself for the eventual and likely consequences of their behavior.
Sound familiar? You might have at least one person in your life that exhibits this type of behavior. If you’re not sure, then ask yourself if there’s a particular person that leaves you feeling exhausted and stressed after every encounter.
Who Are The Typical Victims of Energy Vampires?
Because these human black holes drain energy from those around them, they thrive in social situations when more vulnerable, passive people are available to them. The ideal victim of an Energy Vampire is someone who always sees the good in others, listens to those who need to vent, and doesn’t stand up for themselves when they feel offended or manipulated.
While we’re never truly a victim, only an experiencer of aspects of reality, one cannot help but feel lessened and burdened by ongoing exchanges with Energy Vampires.
If you are a compassionate and open-hearted person, good for you! You should never choose to feel bad about your glowing and positive personality. For healthy people, you are a life-saving support system. For Energy Vamps, you’re dessert.
Energy vampires don’t only prey on compassionate and passive people. They negatively affect everyone around them, including other Energy Vampires!
How to Know If You’re An Energy Vampire’s Prey
Not sure if the source of your problems is an Energy Vampire? There are some telltale signs that your energy is being drained without you being conscious of it. Even though you have a busy and fulfilling life, you might feel lonely, lost, confused, exhausted or unloved. You might feel as though nobody truly knows you, hears you, or “gets” you. When we are loving a narcissist, it’s easy to lose site of our needs that have long-gone unmet.
Energy vampires manifest in many different forms. Maybe a parent or close relative constantly commands your attention while also provoking your guilt for taking any time for yourself.
Perhaps a coworker is a considerable presence at your workplace and doesn’t care who they hurt amid their climb to the top. Maybe you have a friend who constantly involves you in their personal drama without considering your personal space and wellbeing.
At the end of the day, energy vampires can be anyone. To figure out the source of this stress, focus on these points while you meditate:
Do you feel drained after conversations?
Do you feel like your life is engulfed in someone else’s problems?
When you try to express your thoughts or feelings to someone else, are you made to feel guilty or crazy?
Most of all: do you fail to see yourself as the center of your own life?
Protect Yourself from Energy Vampires
Once you’ve identified the source, you can begin to take measures to protect yourself. It’s not always as easy as cutting the Energy Vampire out of your life, but if that’s possible, it’s time to do it. If it isn’t possible, it’s time to start guarding yourself against their energy-draining effects.
First, become an expert at spotting these Vamps. While it’s not healthy to always look for the negative aspects in people or situations, it is essential to be wary of people’s motivations and repeated actions.
Employ tactics that repel these people from your inner sphere. If it’s possible to block or avoid them, such as declining social events they’ll be attending, then it’s best to protect yourself by staying away.
If you can’t stay away, learn to respect yourself and set proper boundaries. Be clear about what behavior is acceptable in your relationships and stick by those rules.
Second, lower your expectations for your relationship with that person. Often, we can be our own worst enemy when we get our hopes up for a healthy relationship with someone incapable of empathy.
Fourth, surround yourself with people who can be your reality check. Talk to friends and family who can look at the situation from an outside perspective. They can be your support system for when you need to guard yourself.
Finally, begin to heal. Being the victim of an energy vampire for any period can be damaging to our senses of Self, our hearts, and our minds. Accepting that a person has been manipulating you and stopping the energy drain is the first step. Then, incorporate self-love practices like daily meditation, deep breathing, and reflection through a diary or my personality cards!
You are a beautiful Living Being filled with light and love, born from stardust. You are unlimited potential in every direction. With a focus on discipline, virtue, and your own goodness, you can become as expanded and liberated as you desire.
Pray for others and the Universe prays for us.